'Twas The Night Before...

I leave tomorrow morning, KSU 5:00am central time.  If you're tracking, it should go live a short while after I depart and I'll appear on a map somewhere west of Dallas.  But I digress.

Admittedly, I'm typing this with mixed emotions.  When I left for Alaska ten years ago almost to the day, I was wired to the hilt and laser focused on touching that sign at the Arctic Circle and knew where I would be stopping each night in order to reach the Circle on schedule.  It's different this trip.  First and foremost, there's no Alaska and irrespective of the cool scenic routes I've created, the excitement factor is fractional by comparison.  Second, with no Alaska, there's no real need for a schedule.  From the beginning, I centered this trip around the 11th annual Road Glide Shark Week with a plan to arrive in Lake Tahoe on June 27th.  I'm still going to Shark Week, as that gathering is my absolute favorite trip each year.

So why I am I not excited?  I think it's a case of apprehension.  When I rode to Alaska, Denver was my first night's stop with Great Falls, Montana on the itinerary for night number two. I knew it for months before I left and I could envision myself riding into town...as planned.  For this trip, there is no plan.  I don't have to be anywhere by any date except for Lake Tahoe, twelve days from tomorrow. I can stop where I want, whenever I want  And that is where I believe the problem lies.  I suppose I need some direction, even on vacation.  Who knew?  I'll go to sleep tonight with full knowledge of when I'm rolling out, but with no idea where I'll go to sleep tomorrow.  I suppose there's a degree of adventure in that, but maybe I subconsciously crave a bit more structure.  These last few sentences sum up my whole dilemma.

My last long ride was to Shark Week X in Gettysburg.  I rode from Texas with my friend "Longway" and we stopped in Louisville, KY before meeting a group of Shark Week X riders in Pittsburgh where we hung out and toured the sights for a night before riding on to Gettysburg the next day. We enjoyed the week in PA with 150 fellow riders, despite the Governor's draconian China virus lockdown measures.  Then on Friday, I headed 1,400 miles back to Texas...in one day; just to see if I could do it. The solo ride back took me 20.5 hours to complete and included the most intense rain storms I've ever seen, much less ridden through.  I had an agenda. I had an itinerary. I had a goal and it was done!

If you've been reading, I am making this trip with Pearl, a trailer loaded with camping gear and creature comforts.  The whole idea of a trailer is to be able to stop where I want when I want and build my camp.  I've spent the better part of the last year preparing the trailer and Hester for a return trip to Alaska with full knowledge that my hopes could be dashed. I've known since March that Alaska was beyond my reach and have had three months to accept it and make alternate plans.  But plans involve detailed itineraries with scheduled stops and I don't have any of that.  I know. Poor me.  I have to take three weeks off work, get on my custom Harley, and ride around the country with no agenda.  Honestly, I know how fortunate I am and I don't take it for granted.

I've realized that at 58 years old, I'm entering a new phase of my life and it's a phase that includes something I've never really had erfore; chill.  I just need to chill out and ride till I'm done and then seek out a place to camp.  Then I need to wake up whenever I feel like it, pack up camp, and ride to the next chill spot.  Rinse and repeat.  I know people who would kill to have this opportunity and I'm pretty sure I will embrace it after I get a few days of it under my belt.  All I can say now - the night before - is I'm uneasy about it, but I'm outta here at 5:00am.  Stay tuned to see where I wind up.

Where's Shrug Quick Link

By request, I've made it easier to cyber stalk me on my ride. Look on the right column below the Alaskapade 2011 video link where it says "WHERE'S SHRUG?". Clicking "Live Feed Map" will take you to a dedicated map page that should be automagically updated by my Garmin satellite tracker. This page can be bookmarked for quicker access and/or printed and pinned to the ceiling above your bed for more intimate viewing. Let's be real. It's time to replace that Scott Baio or Farah Fawcett poster you've had up there for decades anyway. If your ceiling has mirrors, remember that objects are larger than they appear.

The auto posting thing is dynamite on paper. We'll see how it shakes out when I'm on the road.

 

Ladies and Gentlemen, Our Departure is Delayed

Three hundred miles a day?  For fifteen days?  I just can't.  I typically do 300 miles before lunch.  So, I've backed up my departure to Wednesday, June 16th.  It only adds a ~1,000 mile average to the entire twelve-day span, but I can ride a little longer each day with the option to stick around if I like a particular spot, but without the prospect of getting to Tahoe "too soon" and having to kill time.

Look for the GPS map updates to start populating sometime Wednesday morning.  As a reminder, you can follow and message me through this link.

North by Northwest - Finally, A Routing Tool I Trust!

I've discovered MotoWhere; a cool page with a companion app that allows me to click waypoints along a path I want to take and then generates an easy-to-follow route on my phone.  After a bit of trial and error, I used it to generate several routes for this trip and I am very happy with the results.

Everyone asks me why with me being the tech toy geek that I am, why I don't have a cool new GPS.  Actually, I do.  OK, it's cool, but not new.  In fact, it's eleven years old, but the manufacturer still offers firmware and map updates.  The reality is it's just another thing to take up real estate on my handlebars, to keep powered on, and to remove and secure when I'm off the bike.  My phone does it all with a slightly smaller display and I can download the routes for when I'm out of the service area.  Of course, I have paper backups for contingencies.

If I stick to my plan (and really, what are the odds of that?) I'm staring at 5,200 circuitous miles to get to Lake Tahoe and fifteen riding days to do it.  Honestly, I've never ridden such a slow pace.  I'm hoping my matured demeanor will kick in and allow me to stop and smell the roses. If you're tracking me, you'll know.  I rode 5,000 miles from Texas to Fairbanks, Alaska in only six days and even though I was ten years younger, that pace took its toll on me. There were a couple of days where I was so tired when I finally stopped, I didn't even set up a tent. I just unrolled my sleeping bag next to the bike and covered up with a tarp. I had transcended tired and was existing on brain frequencies beyond sleep. At that instant, I think I understood L. Ron Hubbard.  But I digress.

From Lake Tahoe I'll have another 1,700 to 1,900 miles to ride to get back home to Texas, depending on the route I take and where I stop along the way.

While the segments illustrated below are in order, they do not represent a day's travel, or any amount of travel time for that matter.  It was just easier to create bite-sized routes.  The red markers were are waypoints I added to ensure the app uses the twisty backroads routes I want instead of the super slabs I usually take.

North by Northwest - Another Tracking Method

The routes I've selected are primarily remote, twisty roads far from the interstate super slabs.  As such, I expect less than stellar cellular service most of the time I'm riding and perhaps where I camp nightly.  Since the primary tracking method I described in the previous entry is cellular based, I decided to give myself another option for tracking and for emergency communication.

Garmin InReach in the Outback

When I crossed the Outback in 2016, I took with me a satellite tracking device that not only provided extremely granular GPS tracking, but also offered two-way messaging in the most remote parts of the world.  Granted, my North by Northwest routes are remote, but they are by no means as remote as was the Outback.  Still, in the interest of safety and a desire for the ability to call for help irrespective of where I may wander, I blew the dust off the old Garmin InReach SE GPS transponder and activated it for a month.  The InReach will collect more granular GPS location information than my phone and will send those updates at two-to-ten-minute intervals.  I used to know how to embed the interactive map directly into my blog, but I've slept since then and can't remember how I did it.  If I have time to figure it out before I go, the maps will magically appear in the menu on the right side of the page.   If not, they can be directly viewed  at https://share.garmin.com/Shrug.  If prompted for a password, try shrug&hester.  You should be linked to a page that looks something like the image below where you can click and drag, zoom in/out, and change map layers.

 

North by Northwest - Wanna Follow Along?

I've been asked if I will have my ride tracked while I'm on the road, so I decided to configure a following/mapping tool for readers.  It's not perfect, but when it works, it works well.

You can follow this link and enter shrug&hester if prompted for a password.  The interactive map allows for satellite, roads, or hybrid views and can be zoomed in/out as needed.  The app draws a straight line between coordinate updates from my phone, so if it appears I'm bisecting curves, it's just the update interval.  This is usually most visible when zoomed in tight.  Point hover or click on the tracking dots to see details at that instant.  If I travel out of cellular service (which is the plan) then the updates will pause until I re-enter coverage, upon which the cached data in my phone should be added to the map.  The image below is an example from my 2020 trip to Gettysburg.  The app have been completely rewritten, so I expect better representation of mapping.

Decision Made - Staying South of the Border

Sometimes decisions are easy when they're essentially made for you because your options are severely limited.  I as much as I loathe being told where I can and cannot go, I'm even more averse to unnecessary risks.  One such decision has been the topic of a few recent blog entries.

I have been debating attempting to cross the border into Canada and heading up the ALCAN for a ten-year reunion with Alaska.  Prime Minister Trudeau is a bigger idiot than Joe Biden and the restrictions he's imposed are not only crushing Canadians' vacations, they're crushing the Canadian economy as well.  Despite the restrictions, I feel confident I have verifiable documentation for justifiable means to cross in order to "provide an essential service in Alaska".  All I would need is a 72-hour negative China virus test result.  Returning home would be allowed under the provision that I am returning through Canada from essential work, back to my home state.  Again, another virus test would be needed.  Even with my ducks in as much of a row as ducks might get, the final decision is completely subjective and would be up to the Border Agent in duty when I arrive there.  If I get the wrong guy having a bad day, I'm I'm heading south.  I decided that was more risk than I want to take.

I will stay in America where things are increasingly opening up as citizens stand up and demand to reclaim their freedoms.  As such, I've selected some interesting routes that will take me WAY off the beaten path and force me to ride slower, fewer hours per day, and to actually breathe.  While on the Alaskapade in 2011, I rode crazy 900-mile long segments for days on end. I think I'll slow my roll a bit on this trip.  My motivations are very different a decade later.

North by Northwest

I plan to meander my way through New Mexico and  the most iconic northbound routes in Colorado, making my to Red Lodge Montana - the start of the Beartooth Highway.  I'll camp wherever between home and Montana and get there when I get there.

From Red Lodge, I'll ride the Beartooth Highway westward and make my way up to Whidey Island, to which I last rode in 2010 with my mom.  I'll take the Keystone Ferry to Port Townsend/Coupeville and make my east to La Push, WA.  From La Push, I'll start hugging the pacific coastline and ride 101south into Oregon.  I'll have a short tourist stop/photo op in Bend, OR before heading back to the coast and riding south into California.  Once in California, I'll make my way to PC101 and ride the iconic Pacific Coast Highway down to San Luis Obispo.  I'm considering a run all the way south to San Diego, just to say I did it, but will decide based on the time I have left in my schedule.

From either San Diego or San Luis Obispo, I will make my way to Yosemite National Park and then up to Lake Tahoe to a attend a gathering riders that we've had for the last ten years.  While in Tahoe,  I will park the trailer and actually spend five nights in a hotel, which will be a welcome change after two weeks in a tent.  I plan to head back home the following Friday, with a stop somewhere along the way.  It would be nice to be home for Independence Day.

That's it folks.  It ain't Alaska, but I'm going to make the best of it and capture some drone and surface level footage and lots of photos.

Trailer Trash

I wrote previously about building a trailer to pull behind Hester for motorcycle camping.  I picked up a shell of a trailer built by a friend of a friend.  It had good bones and I set out to realize my vision of the perfect motorcycle travel rig.  The eight-inch wheels and bias ply tires were replaced with twelve-inch mags and radials.  Larger wheels spin slower and less and therefore inflict less wear and tear on wheel bearings. Of course, this meant I had to install larger fenders to accommodate the larger wheels. I added a pair of twenty-pound hydraulic strut lifts to hold the clamshell open while I’m loading, unloading, or just digging around in there.  I added surface level D rings in the base of the clamshell, to which I can attach bungee cords that serve to secure cargo while I'm on the move.  I extended the tongue eighteen inches, which moves the clamshell back more from the motorcycle to provide a more stable towing experience and to make load distribution more forgiving.  Load distribution is paramount when pulling a trailer, especially with a motorcycle. The elongated tongue bar gave me room to mount an ice chest holder in front of the clamshell.  Finally, I added a removable 100-watt solar panel to the roof.  This panel charges a small integrated inverter/generator that stores inside the clamshell.  The panel and generator combined weigh less than 25 pounds!  With this rig, I can charge the generator while I ride all day and have multiple 110VAC power outlets and high-speed USB ports for charging my electronics at night.  I had already outfitted Hester with a trailer hitch and wiring for the LED trailer lighting.  Although I haven’t weighed the finished product yet, the entire fully packed and properly balanced rig can be led around and dropped on the trailer hitch ball with just one hand.  It’s everything I envisioned when I set out to create a capable motorcycle trailer rig.

As with any motorcycle maintenance, the trailer needed a shakedown run to prove its road worthiness.  There’s a loop near my home that I like to ride after I work on Hester that offers a a good mix of roughly forty-five miles of curves, pavement, and gravel roads.  I decided to forego this loop and just winged it on my first trailer trip out; riding three hundred miles to the Arkansas National Forest for a weekend camping trip.  While I knew the trailer design and ergonomics were solid, I was still a bit apprehensive about the first trip and I kept my speed down to 60mph for the first thirty or so miles.  The trailer pulled like a dream.  Honestly, it’s easy to forget it’s back there, which would be a nightmare in the wrong circumstances.  It’s most important to account for the additional space needed at gas stations, tight 90-degree corners, and while backing into parking spaces.  Within an hour on the road, I was confidently cruising at 80mph and the trip to Hot Springs was uneventful.  I did notice a hit on gas mileage to the tune of about ten percent, which is only slightly more than riding with an adult passenger.  That's a cost and time factor I will have to consider as I plan trips.

While on the road, I got a lot of odd stares from people not only unaccustomed to seeing a motorcycle pulling a trailer, but a trailer with a solar panel on its roof.  It made for interesting conversations at gas stops, with most people wondering where the equipment the panel charged was and how I interconnected everything.  I think I’ll make a YouTube video.

I learned an interesting aspect of trailering that I had not previously considered.  If I spot an object in my path riding on two wheels, I can usually dodge it.  If I’m in a car, I can usually straddle it.  This is not the case when pulling a trailer with a motorcycle. If there’s an object on the road and insufficient time or distance away to change lanes, something is going to hit it.  Trike riders know this but I’ve never ridden a trike, so it was an epiphany for me.  I’ll do some research on the best tactics, but I suspect letting one of the radial tires take the impact is more practical than the motorcycle.  For one, motorcycle tires are inline, so if one hits it the other follows and they could both be damaged.  The trailer wheels are separated by an axle and the radial tires are more forgiving (and far less expensive) than motorcycle tires.  Trailer wheels are also much easier to change than motorcycle wheels and I carry a spare and lug wrench in the trailer.

All in all, Hester’s first outing with her tag along was an uneventful success.  All the trailer needs is a name.  I decided to call her Pearl as that was the name of Hester Prynne’s illegitimate daughter in The Scarlett Letter.  It seemed only fitting.

 

Alternate Itinerary

Well, shit.

The more I thought about it, the more interested I was in a potential Arctic adventure route change.  As cool as it might be, the reality is the choice might not be mine to make.  Borders around the world (except for the US southern border) are still in a state of flux, thanks again to China and the global virus they unleashed.  The Canadian border is no exception, but there are exceptions to the restrictions that I thought would determine my ultimate route.

Until recently, US citizens could enter Canada in vehicles with the expressed purpose of traveling straight to Alaska with no "tourist" stops along the way.  Drivers' vehicles are tagged at the Canadian border entry and they are given a specific amount of days to exit Canada at an Alaskan border.  Drivers not exiting within the time limit are fined and/or detained.  This boded well for me because I can get through Canada in a few days; even at a leisurely pace of 800 miles per day.  Since I'm tugging a trailer and can just pull over and camp, I'll come in contact with even fewer people. I hoped Canadian border officials would appreciate this, but I honestly don't expect their leadership to act any more rationally than ours.

If the previous travel restrictions were still being enforced when I planned to leave in June, then I would have gone with my original plan and ride through Fairbanks up to Prudhoe Bay.  If time allowed, I might've ridden south to Anchorage on my way out since I've never ridden there.  If the Canadian border restrictions had been relaxed, then I planned to make a turn to the north outside Dawson City and ride new ground (for me) to the Arctic Ocean north of the Dempster Highway.  I haven't done the research to speculate the amount of time it will take to get to Tuktoyaktuk, but I've read that the roads are mostly unpaved and that there are multiple river crossings where I'll be at the mercy of ferry schedules. I also must remember that this trip will be capped off by riding to Shark Week XI and as such, I have to plan my dates to the greatest extent possible around arriving in Lake Tahoe by June 28th.

People who know me know that I end to be spontaneous in life...except with my road trips.  There are so many things that could go wrong that I have to plan every detail with backup alternatives because when it comes to achieving personal accomplishments, I don't like leaving things to chance.  That said, there are many uncertainties that I'll just have to face when they happen. That uncertainty is all part of the adventure and I am in real need of adventure!

Canada has introduced a new economy-crushing initiative that forces travelers to pay a $2,000 fee for the privilege of staying in a pre-selected quarantine hotel for three nights and that must be followed up for an additional eleven days of local quarantine.  Makes no fucking sense whatsoever.

I won't let anyone, much less Canada stop me from making an epic trip.  I rode to Shark Week X in Gettysburg in July during the height of the pandemic nonsense and in one of the most locked-down states in the country.  Our event had a great crowd, went off without a hitch, and those who bailed on it out of fear regretted it from the first days when all the arrival photos started being posted.  We played it safe and acted responsibly.  Not one of the attendees became ill after returning home.

If Trudeau doesn't pull his head out of his ass, my current plan is to make my way through Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, and Idaho to Washington.  Then, I'll follow highway 101 south, hugging the coastline through Washington, Oregon, and into California; camping all the way up and down.  Once in Cali, I'll catch super scenic PC1 and ride it at least as far south as San Luis Obispo.  If time permits, I might ride all the way to San Diego before turning northeast and heading towards Yosemite and on to Lake Tahoe for Shark Week XI.

I mapped out a few potential scenic routes that ought to offer some camping spots along the way.  I'm sure these will change over the next six weeks.  Stay tuned!

Alaskapade 2021 - A Route Change?

I've been planning my return to the Arctic ever since my 2020 Everest trip was scuttled by the China virus.  At 58 years old, I still have a few adventures in me and it's been ten years, so why not return?  On my last Alaska trip in 2011, I rode deep into the Arctic Circle, turning around at Coldfoot Camp due to weather on the north slope.  Although riding to the Arctic Circle sign was my goal, I entertained the idea of riding to Dead Horse and seeing the Arctic Ocean.

 

I have pics of my riding boots in the Atlantic, Pacific, and Indian Oceans and the Gulf of Mexico.  Snapping a pic of them in the Arctic Ocean would be cool.  The problem is, in Alaska, vehicles are prohibited to drive past Deadhorse in Prudhoe Bay.  If I want to see the water, I'll have to hop on a bus with the other tourists.  But, there is another option.

One of the most scenic roads in Canada is the Dempster (Inuvik-to-Tuktoyaktuk) Highway.  This "road" is primarily gravel crap and there are several ferry crossings, but it will take me all the way to the Arctic shore.  I think it's time to rethink my trip.

Will it still be called the Alaskapade?

 

 

As I type this, the more I think about it, the more interested I get in the potential Arctic adventure route change.  As cool as it might be, the reality is the choice might not be mine to make.  Borders around the world are in a state of flux, thanks again to China and the global virus they unleashed.  The Canadian border is no exception, but there are exceptions to the restrictions that will determine my ultimate route.

Currently, US citizens can enter Canada in vehicles with the expressed purpose of traveling straight to Alaska with no "tourist" stops along the way.  Drivers' vehicles are tagged at the Canadian border entry and they are given a specific amount of days to exit Canada at an Alaskan border.  Drivers not exiting within the time limit are fined and/or detained.  This bodes well for me because I can get through Canada in a few days; even at a leisurely pace of 800 miles per day.  Since I'm tugging a trailer and can just pull over and camp, I'll come in contact with even fewer people. I'm hoping the Canadian border officials will appreciate this.  If the current travel restriction is still being enforced when I plan to leave in June, then I will go with my original plan and ride through Fairbanks up to Prudhoe Bay.  If time allows, I might ride south to Anchorage on my way out since I've never ridden there.

If the Canadian border restrictions are relaxed, then I think I'll make the turn to the north outside Dawson City and ride new ground (for me).  I haven't done the research to speculate the amount of time it will take to get to Tuktoyaktuk, but I've read that the roads are mostly unpaved and that there are multiple river crossings where I'll be at the mercy of ferry schedules. I also must remember that this trip will be capped off by riding to Shark Week XI and as such, I have to plan my dates to the greatest extent possible around arriving in Lake Tahoe by June 28th.  People who know me know that I tend to be spontaneous in life...except with my road trips.  There are so many things that could go wrong that I have to plan every detail with backup alternatives because when it comes to achieving personal accomplishments, I don't like leaving things to chance.  That said, there are many uncertainties that I'll just have to face when they happen. That uncertainty is all part of the adventure and I am in real need of adventure!

 Stay tuned!

This is the route I'm considering.

 

From Cool to Comfort - The Geezer Glide Path

2006 H-D Wide Glide

All Harleys are cool, although some are arguably more cool than others and there always those that stand out.  My first Harley was a 2006 Wide Glide.  I enjoyed customizing it and rolling into my favorite biker dive, Stroker's Ice House where it always turned heads.  After a few years, riding to Stroker's and around town had grown old and I started venturing out.  Before I knew it, I was doing 1,000 mile weekends, which in those days was impressive (at least to me) on a non-touring bike.

By 2010, I had the long ride bug and knew it was time to move to a more accommodating platform, both in terms of comfort and storage.  That's when I traded cool for comfort.  I had seen Road Glides, but never really paid attention to them.  I never paid attention to any touring bikes because they were boring to me.  In my eyes, they were one step from a trike and a trike was one step from a Gold Wing and a Gold Wing was one step from a wheel chair.  When I decided to "move up", I focused on the Road Glide because it was different.  Its pointed nose and stationary fairing stood out in a crowd and people called it "fugly". In September, I made a late night deal with a salesman in his end-of-quarter sales stretch and left my Wide Glide behind.  And just like that, I was officially a Geezer Glider.

Hester Has Been There and Back

That was ten years ago and I haven't looked back. I've ridden "Hester" through 49 states to amazing points of interest and across all the iconic and scenic routes.  She was totaled in 2016, only to be reborn with fresh paint and an over-the-top audio system and in 2019, she got a new 110" motor.  At eleven years old, she's as fresh as she was the day I brought her home. And...in the Road Glide world, she's actually cool.

That's not to say I haven't added my share up updates.  I'm not much of a chrome guy and I haven't accessorized with every possible bolt-on part.  But, I do appreciate comfort.  Over the years, I've added Ohlins suspension, a super comfy custom seat packed with gel padding and hospital-grade memory foam, and a windscreen that works so well I can smell my farts at 70mph.  I suppose passengers might not appreciate that last part as much as I do.  I also went overboard with audio.  I usually listen to audiobooks through my helmet speakers, but let's just say that when I crank it up and listen to Led Zeppelin, everyone around me listens to Led Zeppelin.

On my long rides, I usually cash in hotel points to sleep in a comfy room and enjoy a soft mattress,  Wi-Fi and a free breakfast.  But this is not always the case.  I really like camping and I'm pretty adept at it.  In 2011, I purchased camping gear in preparation for my first ride to Alaska and took a few short distance practice trips to sort out suspension load adjustments, added weight handling, and optimal packing.  There wasn't much room, so I learned to pack very efficiently.  The gear I purchased was well-suited for motorcycle camping as it was both lightweight and compactable.  The trip to the REI store on the day of their annual "garage sale" was quite an interesting event unto itself.  You can read about it here.  But I digress.

I've used the gear I purchased in 2010 and 2011 many times and have gotten more than my money's worth out of it.  I most recently moto-camped in Guadalupe Mountains National Park, which was a mere 600-mile lunch ride from my home to the west Texas/New Mexico border.  The tent, while generally serviceable, had a few holes in the nylon here and there, torn zippers, and the flexible fiberglass rods that form the structure had started to split due to age.  The sleeping bag was a super-compact Ranger bag rated to -5°F.  While that's nice, it's also a mummy bag, meaning it's tapered from shoulder width at the top to barely wider than the width of my two feet at the bottom.  I remember being very comfy in this bag over the years, but this time I felt like I was sleeping in a combined coffin and straight jacket.  Temple Grandin would love it.  The bag's zipper had been torn and I was forced to sleep with it unzipped.  While that gave me room to wiggle, it did little to keep in my body heat in the cool night mountain air.  To top it all off, the single-width air mattress I purchased in 2010 no longer held air.  It's time for new gear.

Now that I'm ten years older (if not wiser), I'm taking a different approach to camping gear.  The technology has matured over the last decade and I plan to take advantage of it.  As entertained as I was by the crowd in December of 2010, I will not be attending the REI garage sale.  I may have grown no wiser over the last tenth of a century, but it's a given that the eco-Nazi douche-nozzle crowd that frequents that place will have grown exponentially worse.  I'll buy elsewhere.

Chateau Shrug 2021

My new camping gear approach will prioritize comfort and performance over compact and lightweight.  For starters, I want a tent in which I can actually stand up.  My old tent was described as being able to comfortably accommodate three men.  My experience in that tent taught me that those three men would have to be extremely "close"...and possibly dwarfs.  While I was able to sit upright in it and it did hold the items I wanted removed from the bike overnight, it was oppressively small and confining.  For Christmas this year, my son bought me a new Coleman tent that is taller and also has a larger floor space.  Check one item off the list!

I also want a full-size sleeping bag.  In fact, I want one of those double bags for two people that is essentially two like bags zipped together.  While I foresee no chance of a second person ever occupying the extra space, I want to to be able to spread out in my sleeping bag.  This is especially important after riding for ten to twelve hours day-after-day.  Furthermore, I tend to flop around in bed and when I'm wrapped like a mummy, I wake up realizing I'm confined and then I fight to get comfortable and go back to sleep. Even if I repaired the zipper, he mummy bag simply will not work anymore.

Finally, I'll have a real air mattress with a battery-powered inflation pump.  Even as small as that old mattress was, blowing it up the old fashioned way made me dizzy back then.  I'd probably slip into a coma if I tried today.  I picked up a double bed-sized model and used it on my Guadalupe trip.  Now I'm spoiled and there's no going back to the slim  compact mattress that was barely wide enough to keep one skinny guy off the ground.  And since I'm spoiling myself, I might as well pack a real pillow.  Although the postage stamp-sized pillow that I used for the last decade compressed tightly and packed down to the size of a corn dog, if I'm being honest with myself, it never was really comfortable.

Hester - Packed for Action

Don't read me wrong here.  I have no regrets over the gear I purchased in 2010.  Indeed, it served me well on numerous camping trips.  Of equal importance to its longevity is the fact that it all packed neatly onto Hester in a single dry sack that fit on the passenger seat tucked between me and the backrest.  So given that fact, you may be asking yourself just how the hell Shrug will be able to pack all this larger gear and not look like the Clempetts when they loaded up the truck and they moved to Bever-lee...Hills, that is.  The answer is...I won't.  Although the new tent is compact, it still packs a bit larger than the old one.  That ranger sleeping bag could be rolled down to the size of a small coffee can, but the new double-sized bag that I plan to purchase comes with with extra padding and a thick flannel inner lining.  I'll be fortunate to be able to roll and compress this one down to the size of two BBQ grill propane tanks laid end-to-end.  And since we're talking comfort over compact, might as well make the new pillow a full-size memory foam one and a real chair to the mix.

The solution?  A trailer!  I've seen motorcycles pulling trailers for years and as it turns out, there's a plethora of models and styles available.  Once I decided to head back to the Arctic Circle, I also decided to find a way to bring more creature comforts this time.  I'd like to claim that my tastes have been refined, but the reality is I'm old and brittle and I just think I deserve it.  I started researching pull-behind motorcycle trailers and the first fact I learned is those damned things are expensive!  A company called Bushtec makes the Cadillac of motorcycle trailers.  Actually, make that the Mercedes Benz; way out of my league financially...even for the used ones  Besides the trailer itself, there's adapting the bike with a secure and robust hitch with witch to tow the trailer.  Even a moderately-loaded trailer will subject the motorcycle's rear end to torque and stress that it was never designed to handle, and negotiating the physics on two wheels is far more challenging than on four.  A good hitch kit is not cheap and a cheap hitch kit is probably not good.  Actually, it might be, but that's not a risk I am willing to assume on the roads and for the distance I will be riding.  Once the trailer is hitched to the motorcycle, it has to be wired to the brake lights and turn signals.  Research has taught me that this wiring is more complicated than just splicing the trailer harness to the brake lights like we do for cars.  The additional electrical load from the trailer's lights that can adversely affect the motorcycle's electrical system has to be countered.

I found a trailer that will do the job and that I can afford.  It's not the Cadillac by any means, It's not even a Ford.  I'd say it's somewhere between a Ford and a Yugo.  The bottom line is it is structurally sound, lightweight, and has more than enough room for the gear I plan to take; even with my full-sized pillow and super-sized sleeping bag.

Once I knew what I would be towing, finding a safe hitch system that would do the trick was easy and it turns out that hitch is manufactured by Bushtec.  I may not be able to afford their trailers, but I know I can't afford to use a cheap hitch and theirs is beefy and very well designed to distribute the stress on the motorcycle frame.  If the difficulty of installation is any indicator, the Bushtec hitch ought to perform like a Mercedes, although I suppose I'll settle for a Ford.  I was able to piece together and install a wiring harness that won't tax Hester's nervous system.  The trailer I bought has all LED indicators, so there's practically no measurable additional electrical load on the bike.  I registered and plated the trailer and am now fully prepared to hit the road...in-tow.

Beefy Struts for Reliability & a Removable Ball for Invisibility

I have six months to play around with towing practice and to sort out loading and weight distribution, all while finding the ideal packing arrangement to keep the tongue weight down.  The storage area's clam shell design has plenty of room.  In fact, it may have too much.  I suppose I can also pack oil for a mid-trip oil change, tools, and some more creature comforts as long as I don't go overboard. Still, I will have to figure out a means of  securing things in their place once they're packed.  The last thing I need is for my carefully-planned and strategically-packed supplies to be moving about inside the trailer unbeknownst to me until I hit the brakes or dive into a corner.  I will also have to develop my trailering skills.  The good news is I can barely tell the trailer is back there when I'm towing it.  The bad news is I can barely tell the trailer is back there when I'm towing it.  I can see where I could easily become complaisant and forget to leave sufficient room for curbs when cornering or obstructions when fueling up at a gas station.  Speaking of fuel, after eleven years, I can predict Hester's fuel consumption and range to within a few miles.  Now, I will have to become acquainted with the reduced mileage per tank.  It may feel like there's no trailer back there, but the motor will be well-aware of the additional load and by the time I leave, I should too.  All of this can be overcome with practice rides around town and on the highway; and as I said, I have six months.

Those who know me know I name things.  My orange Kubota tractor is named "Bevo".  My Saab 9-3 is named "Saabrina".  I even named my zero-turn mower "Twister".  You know where Hester's name came from, so it's fitting that I name the trailer "Pearl".  Stay tuned for updates on my skills progress and perhaps an improved look for Pearl.